Relationships
A Final Farewell – And My Last Giveaway
For those who haven’t noticed…. I haven’t been on Kaneva in several months. I’m doing just fine, but I’ve become overwhelemed with lots of other projects. Those that know me pretty well know that I am a drummer, I’ve been playing drums for almost 16 years.
Recently I’ve been involved with a new website all about drumming (I’m not posting the link here since it really isn’t relevant to this blog – if you want it… message me – I still check my kmail occasionaly). Along with playing in my own band I have also started part time work as a drum tech for an amazing Atlanta drummer and have been running his entire online presense (twitter, myspace, facebook, website). Along with my real job I just don’t have the time to write on this blog or actively participate in Kaneva any more.
This isn’t to say that I might not pop back in world on a slow day to say “hi”, but I definetly don’t have the commitment time needed to write quality blog posts for all of you wonderful (well at least most of you are) people .
Love me or hate me, doesn’t really matter in the end… the people that I was close with on Kaneva love me and that’s really all that does matter.
Now for my last giveaway –
I’m giving away this entire blog!!! That’s right the whole fuckin thing! This isn’t some random drawing contest though…. I will choose the winner and if you don’t like who I choose – too fuckin bad… it’s my blog and I’ll give it away if I want to =)
Anyone who is interested in taking over this blog, please send me a kmail that includes information for how long you’ve been on Kaneva … how much time you spend on Kaneva a day (average)….. and why you want this blog.
But wait!! that’s not all. I will also hand over the keys to the Kanevian Blog community on Kaneva and the Kanevian Blog Mogulus account.
That’s right bitches… I’m handing over the keys to my kingdom empire! So get those kmails sent – impress me and you get it all!
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )6 Things To Improve Your Kaneva Relationships
They blossom, they fall, they are always changing – your relationships on Kaneva. There are many types of relationships that occur – the friendship, the temporary lust, the puppy love, the romance. All of these types of relationships/interactions are similar to the real-world, except since we are in a digital space… they seem to move at the speed of light.
In this post I want to focus more on the romantic relationships. I’m not a “love doctor” by any means, but I think I have some solid advice to offer.
1. Communicate
This is probably the biggest downfall of any relationship, but it is also what can be used to fuel the fires. Communication is sooooooooooo very important. Choosing the right words to describe how you feel, picking the right time to use these words, and making sure that you are consistent with them all play a huge role in how your relationship unfolds.
Don’t jump in too quickly with the “L-bomb”, people throw out the word “Love” a lot – and sometimes too quickly, involving feelings from the other party that might not be exactly what they expected. I’m not saying you can’t find love or fall in love quickly – it happens. Just be careful and be sure that you are using the term correctly. People often confuse the pre-feeling of love (lust) with actually being in love.
Do tell the other person exactly how you feel, but make sure it’s not just a fleeting feeling of the moment.
Use as many forms of communication as possible… use Kaneva chat, Instant Messaging, Phone, Twitter, Kmail, Email… whatever you are comfortable with in your relationship at the time.
2. Don’t sweat the small stuff
If you get mad about what you sig. other is doing or saying… think about it for a minute before you express your anger. Try to decide if this is even really worth discussing. So many fights are started about issues that in the grand scope of things are really insignificant. If your partner is doing/saying something that really upsets you then read #3.
3. Don’t get angry – discuss
It’s ok to tell someone that what they are doing is hurting you or upsetting you. Just try to detach as much emotion as possible (which I know is extremely hard to do). Try having a civilized discussion with them telling them how you feel and why you feel that way. Don’t run circles around the issue since this just generally causes tempers to flair even more.
4. Keep things interesting
Don’t do it by creating drama – Do it by creating surprise and intrigue. Send a text or a kmail telling them how much you appreciate them when they don’t expect it. Send out a blast with an inside joke that only they might get. Plan out a Kaneva date for them and keep them entertained.
5. Don’t be so fucking serious!
Joke with the one you call your own…. if you are serious all the time then you are just a stick in the mud… and no one is generally a fan of this. If I can’t have fun with you because you are always being serious, then I won’t have fun in our relationship… I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way.
6. Compliments are complimentary
Don’t fish for compliments and don’t wait to compliment until your significant other says something nice to you. Everyone likes to be told they look good or that they are the bees knees…. Compliment based on how you feel about the other person and don’t do it expecting something in return. Be genuine and thoughtful and they should return the favor.
What’s your advice for having a good and strong Kaneva relationship? Harleys, Char, Fur – I’m lookin at you guys here ;-)… let me know in the comments!
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 3 so far )The Kanevian Blog Spotlight
Acknowledgment – telling someone they did a great job, telling them they are an ass, just telling them something. Acknowledgment comes in many forms – a shape shifter in its own right. I’ve been acknowledged in both the positive and negative sense at many points in my life…. to me, just the acknowledgment is important – I don’t care how it comes. I welcome positive acknowledgment and use negative acknowledgment for self improvement.
But, now I’m digressing – In this post I want to introduce my own personal way of acknowledging the citizens of Kaneva who stand out to me – I want to shine a spotlight in their direction!
Quite a while ago I noticed a Kanevian who always seemed to have a positive outlook and fantastic sense of humor. I had the pleasure of interviewing this Kanevian, but got much more of a bang for my buck when this motorcycle riding army veteran requested his well known wife also be interviewed.
Let me introduce to you Captain and Mrs. Captain – The Harleys
When asked about his positive attitude in world and in the forums, The Captain attributes this to his upbringing from his grandmother and his decision that it was better to be happy regardless of what happens then it was to be sad… it comes from his love of people.
MrsCaptainHarley’s positive outlook also comes from a love of people… she believes in acknowledgment… acknowledgment of an issue being fixed or a job well done.
“Everyone likes to know they’re appreciated.”
These two are very industrious, and this can be seen in the beautifully designed Landsend hangout. I asked the duo if they had any tips for club owners – According to Captain H, people like different activities, it’s good to mix things up a little bit, don’t just have a dance off.
The Mrs. adds – greet the people and recognize them… especially when they are new.
I asked CaptainHarley to give me a good reason to go to lands end…. his comedic response (with great delivery and timing) – “because I’m there”. For those that are interested – Landsend is being redisgned (and may actually be completed by the time this post hits) to cut back on the lag…. I visited the hangout several weeks ago and was quite impressed with the building/design.
I asked the Captain and his wife what they like doing the most
“I’m a bit of a showoff”
CaptainHarley’s favorite Kaneva activity is hosting parties where there is a lot of “give and take” conversation. MrsCaptainHarley enjoys building and helping out the n00bs (my word not hers =)).
Captain has built several places of interest including:
- Landsend
- The Conflict Management Institute
- Captains Cove
- and The Kanevan Parliament
These hangouts were built with some forward thinking ideas – hosted at one of these hangouts (I believe Landsend) is a Kaneva Marketplace – a place for builders and designers to show off their work and hopefully pick up some new business, A Kaneva Stock Exchange – a place to fund different Kaneva companies and make some profit of your own.
Built on it’s own land is the impressive Kanevan Parliament – CaptainHarley would like to see a participatory democracy within Kaneva with Parliament positions being filled by elected officials (talk to him for more information on this).
I asked the two how they stay drama free
MrsCaptainHarley told me that the two just try to do their own thing – if the situation gets bad, they just go somewhere else.
As for Captain H – He makes it “painfully obvious” the he is happily married. Him and his wife also try to be in the same place at the same time.
The Captain begins to rack up some brownie points as he tells me that MrsCaptainHarley (his Real Life Wife by the way) is very kind, very affectionate, and very loving.
As a former counselor and mediator, CaptainHarley prides himself on being able to help peacefully solve disputes between Kaneva members.
So, if you haven’t gotten a chance to meet CaptainHarley and the Mrs’ – swing on by Landsend or just say hello if you see them in the mall!
Do you know someone that should be in the Kanevian Blog Spotlight? Send me a Kmail or PM and tell me why.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 10 so far )Importance is where you find it
Howdy reader,
I have been given the great honor of posting my own thoughts and stories here, alongside the supremely talented Mr. SFNdust. Try to keep the two of us straight, because while I know the rumor was floated out there that we are one in the same, you will soon be able to tell which is which just based on the fact that he writes well, and I hack away like everything i write was for an IM or Txt. Which explains why I like IM and Txts so much, I suppose.
Kaneva is a lot of different things to a lot of different people. There are thousands of stories. Some use it as an escape from their own boring or abusive reality into a world where people are friendly and accepting. Others are forced to use it from their beds, and their only reach into any form of socialization. Unfortunately, some use it as a place to push their agenda. Others use the world and its people as their drama sandbox, to see who they can push around who they can fish-hook with niceness, then gut with drama, rumors and lies. Others quickly pop in and out to say hello and go on with their lives.
Myself, I originally started Kaneva as a past-time. Like having baseball on the tv in the background while you write checks for your bills, or like the Nascar race playing while you do the dishes, vacuum the carpets, and mate socks. As a past-time. Something to do when there simply is nothing else going on.
As you can tell by me, since I am writing a blog about Kaneva, and I can tell about you, since you are reading a blog some guy wrote about Kaneva, this game’s roll in your life changes as you go, and one finds themselves much more ingrained that they expected.
I started out hitting up the world for hellos, dances, and to build and see interesting buildings with my lady by my side. Since that time almost 2 years ago, now I have 10 communities with ambitious building projects in all sorts of levels of completeness, I am one of the chief officers of an in-game clan, I am an in world DJ of some renown, and I have almost 1800 raves, 300 friends and 300 more pending friend requests.
What happened?
Well, I guess I ended up with more spare time then I thought. Or more specifically, I created more spare time. Its amazing how 2am on a work day doesn’t seem late when you’ve got about 12 more floor panels to lay and texture, to get a new building complete. Or how it easily buys another hour of your time when someone in the club you are DJing shouts that they love your music, or that the song you just played as their jam.
However, I think that type of system has its disadvantages. I haven’t gotten all the sleep that I’d like. I have new building ideas all the time, so of my 10 communities, somewhere between zero and none are complete. There are RL friends whose IMs i have ignored because i was looking up a song someone requested. My freelance graphic design work has almost completely dried up.
But the big disadvantage for me, was that recently the cruel roulette wheel of misfortune dislodged from its moorings, rolled through the city, with fleeing Kaneva citizens screaming and running, and ran smack into my head, knocking my vision blurry, my head dizzy, and the arms full of people in the game I loved, scattered all across the road like the gummy snack wrappers and fast food cartons from someone’s minivan’s trash bag tossed aside.
Drama hit, and it hit hard. It hit long. An issue that should have been over in a weekend went off for over a week. Feelings were hurt, long term friendships were severed, events were canceled, members quit, cell phone records were subpoenaed, real physical relationships were tested and strained.
All in all, it was a really bad week.
Which is why I encourage people to do one simple thing. Chill.
Remember and remind yourself that its a game. Its an option. Its a past-time.
Recently, a guy who was a big part of the Mafia, who was responsible for a large part if its success, a guy whom i spent countless hours next to, building, talking, or simply dancing in a club, announced that the reason he hadn’t been in game for a while, was that he was battling cancer.
At 24.
It really put the game in perspective for me. Here we are, moaning and bitching and hastily pounding out IMs to people about what she said about her statement about him… and an in-game friend is laying in a hospital bed waiting for the doctor to tell him his chance of survival.
Made me very self-aware at how silly we had all been, how seriously we had all begun to take it, and it humiliated me. I felt guilty. It was that creeping heat up the back of your neck like when you were 8 years old, and you could hear your mother’s (or worse, father’s) footsteps behind you as you were up on the counter, reaching your hand deep into the Oreo bag, less than an hour before dinner. You knew you were wrong, and the prickly heat of guilt told you so.
In order to make myself feel better, selfishly, and in order to help make a difference in this world, selflessly, I conceived of the lasted large effort in Kaneva: The Kaneva Mafia Cancer Benefit group and event. You can visit the community page here: http://www.kaneva.com/channel/TheKanevaMafiaCancerBenefitPage.channel I also encourage you to join and rave the community.
Here is the simple version of the plan; We will spread the word, collect credits, world items, world clothing, as well as cash. We will create one bundle, and post it on ebay for sale. On October 12th we will have a big event in world, to raise awareness. We will announce the total donations to that point, and direct as many people to the ebay acution as possible.
At the event, we will accept additional donations, to assemble a second bundle to sell on ebay. The proceeds from both of these auctions will be donated, in our Mafia brother’s name, to the American Cancer Society. http://www.cancer.org
I’m hoping people in world will be generous. I’m also calling for everyone in world to politely ask their local GM to donate to the cause as well. I’d love for this to be a featured event in admin blasts, for the GMs to donate large ticket items, exclusive items, etc. I’d really like this to become bigger than me and my Mafia friends expressing our love for our brother. I’d like for it to become a large rally, with Kaneva as a company involved.
Please donate as much as you can. If you would prefer, I am also accepting donations through PayPal, so as to shortcut the credit-buying process, if you prefer. Just contact me here or through the KMail feature.
All in all, I think this now gives us reason to take Kaneva so seriously. Something serious and important and urgent. Much more so than the Nascar race on the tv while you vacuum.
– Paynomind
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 4 so far )« Previous Entries
The Kanevian Blog 
My Field Trip To The Kaneva Inc. Office
Posted on February 24, 2009. Filed under: Contests, Kaneva Inc., Relationships | Tags: Chris Klaus, Comment Contest, Corelli, Kaneva, Kaneva Business, Kaneva Contest, Kaneva Inc., Kaneva relationships, Kaneva Suggestions, SFNdust, ShamelessPlugs |
Last Thursday I took a field trip to the real life home of the Virtual World of Kaneva. A few days prior to this trip I sent a quick message to ShamelessPlugs – Kaneva’s head of marketing and public relations to talk to her about doing a guest post on Kaneva’s official blog. We talked about meeting up for lunch and she offered me an invitation to come and meet the team at the Kaneva office.
Unfortunately, I was running late and missed most of the team as they were already at lunch. However, I did get to meet many of the names that we know and (sometimes) love – Rotini, Corelli, and CKlaus were among those I was able to shake hands with and say hello to.
The visit started off by me getting lost in the large office complex that Kaneva is located in here in Atlanta. Once I found the right building I was surprised when the elevator door opened and I was greeted by a vast blue wall that hosted the Kaneva logo – a very clean (almost zen like) lobby. I was actually expecting the elevator doors to open and see doors that matched all of the others that I had seen in the other office building (the wrong one). However, I was surprised to learn that Kaneva had grown so much that it needed it’s own floor.
I got a quick tour from ShamelessPlugs showing off the offices and seeing the employees hard at work to develop the 3d world of Kaneva. After the tour concluded Shameless, Corelli, and I went to lunch and talked shop. On the way over I got a nice surprise as we were accompanied on our walk by Chris Klaus (Kaneva CEO and Co-Founder) and Animesh Saha (Vice President of Kaneva Engineering) and was asked several questions about my feelings on Kaneva and was told about some of the new exciting features to come – such as user developed flash games and new deeds that will soon be released.
At lunch we talked about my feelings on the changes made to 2d profiles, some of my pet-peeves with the game, some of the things I would like to see, and one of the most important things of all… the changes YOU would like to see. We talked about how Kaneva Ideas has made it easy for customer service to keep track of all of the changes the users would like to see and get the attention of these ideas from developers and Kaneva upper management.
Corelli and I discussed challenges faced by customer service professionals (I have spent many years working in the technology industry with several degrees of customer service). Overall I was happy to see how much Kaneva wants to listen to their users input to make changes (even though those changes sometimes seem to take forever).
Like a dummy, I forgot to bring a camera – but I am hoping to make more trips to their office and will try to take some more pictures (and show up on time so I can meet more of the staff). They were very nice to me and if nothing else made great company for lunch.
OK – Now the fun part of this post for you guys…. ANOTHER COMMENT CONTEST!!!!
While I was at the office I was given a Dance Party 3D card (the card they used to sell at Target) worth 1500 credits as a gift. I wanna give these credits to you!!!! This contest will be very similar to the last comment contest I had on the blog, but there are a few changes so read the rules below:
What your blast should look like:
Tips for helping me help you: When you leave a comment for the contest use your Kaneva Screen Name and an email address that is valid so I can contact you easier if you win. If you email me a screen sot of your blast, please include your Kaneva Screen Name in the email. If you have any further questions – feel free to PM, Kmail, or Email me.
So let’s get to it Kaneva – Come and win your 1500 credits!!!